I am depressed, I feel like I stand nowhere, I will probably not be able to make anything...
The reason:
Much of the time in last two days I spent in reading posts by Mr. Anurag Kashyap on passionforcinema.com, and this guy has made me feel like a tiny little helpless fish in a deep ocean.
Reading about his experiences and struggle on Black Friday, right from the concept to the realization of every little or big incident that was a part of the story, be it the incidents explained by Mr. Hussain Zaidi's book 'Black Friday' or the real-life footages shown on many news channels, or his own artistic vision; his efforts to raise money and to convince Arindam and mid-day to make a movie instead of a six episode tv-show, bringing the entire crew together, casting, the production and post production, anxiety before the release, the censor board's objections, high court's rulings that led to a ban on the movie's screening, delay of another two years, re-release, and feedbacks/reviews from newspapers/tv channels... hfff
I don't even see that level of passion in me, don't even think I have the capability to go through that sort of struggle, so immature I am, how do I think I can survive? All I know is to write about me, or the people around me... for me that's the end of the world. Never took any interest in politics, neither in history, nor in economics... I feel at a loss now. What the hell was I doing all those years living my life like a bum, ignoring every important incident that happened in the world outside of my range of vision.
I feel like a loser, I feel like a kite with broken spars, dreams to fly high but no strength, no capabilities to move up.
I am broken. I have lost my hopes. Somebody, come forwards and tell me I don't deserve anything, somebody tell me that I will never be successful.
Sunday, July 8, 2007
Tuesday, June 26, 2007
Reviewers... short story # 2
Another short screenplay, this time an attempt at a rather absurd looking comedy... let me know how many movie spoofs you can figure out from that screenplay.
Of course, It still needs so many refinements, especially the ending, that has been written in a haste...
But still, I must pay my special thanks to prashant for his habit of waking up in the mid of the night, turning all the lights on, and talking to his girlfriend all night long. This idea would not have born without those efforts from his side.
Of course, It still needs so many refinements, especially the ending, that has been written in a haste...
But still, I must pay my special thanks to prashant for his habit of waking up in the mid of the night, turning all the lights on, and talking to his girlfriend all night long. This idea would not have born without those efforts from his side.
Reviewers needed, for a short screenplay.
No. I am not dead; I am still alive and kicking.
I was just struggling to find the topic for my next post, and all of a sudden, a thought came to my mind.
"How about publishing the stupid looking short screenplays you have written?"
Not a bad idea at all ! - I said.
If nothing else, bad publicity will also be a sort of publicity.
Too bad... blogger doesn't even provide me the option to upload a pdf directly, so had to resort to googlepages.
Here is a link to a short story, a little romance drama, yet to be titled.
Let me know of your thoughts / comments...
critics, its your turn to attack.
I was just struggling to find the topic for my next post, and all of a sudden, a thought came to my mind.
"How about publishing the stupid looking short screenplays you have written?"
Not a bad idea at all ! - I said.
If nothing else, bad publicity will also be a sort of publicity.
Too bad... blogger doesn't even provide me the option to upload a pdf directly, so had to resort to googlepages.
Here is a link to a short story, a little romance drama, yet to be titled.
Let me know of your thoughts / comments...
critics, its your turn to attack.
Monday, June 4, 2007
Ghalib in Delhi
What happens when Mirza Asadullah Khan, aka Ghalib is reborn and comes back to the city of his dreams, Delhi.
Oh really, is that the city of dreams, with so much of crowd, rickshaw-pullers, autos, mini-buses and biharis (no offense); Urdu being an obsolete language that nobody understands, and replaced with what we know as hinglish, which our protagonist has troubles adjusting with. Delhi, that now has been divided into Greater Kailash, Mayur Vihar, Chanakya Puri and what not, and somewhere in a corner there is the poet's beloved place, ballimaran that finds itself confined to a few narrow roads no one wants to go to. The river Yamuna, that at one time looked to be the dividing border-line between Delhi and the rest of the world, now finds itself situated inside Delhi.
Well, the plot just begins here.
What follows is the poet's journey to establish himself and regain his stature of the good old Ghalib, that now stays in people's memories only through Jagjit Singh's ghazals or Nasiruddin Shah's TV serial act; But is it really that easy to regain his status of a poet? With all those 'janam samjha karo' and 'bidi jalaye le' songs being on the tip of everyone's tongue, who wants to recall those hard to understand words of 'aah ko chaahiye ik umr asar hone tak'?
Spontaneous, well written and flawlessly acted, with a wonderful sense of timing, this one is a dose of non-stop laughter for almost one and half an hour. Such well executed plays are a rarity these days.
A near-perfect comical, satirical masterpiece for which the entire team deserves a big applause. Those who missed 'Ghalib in New Delhi' on Jun 3rd, can have the fortune of watching it again on Jun 17th 2007. My advice: don't miss it this time.
Note: The words and opinions stated above are solely of the author himself, who is said to be under the strong influence of the play and finding hard to come out of it.
Oh really, is that the city of dreams, with so much of crowd, rickshaw-pullers, autos, mini-buses and biharis (no offense); Urdu being an obsolete language that nobody understands, and replaced with what we know as hinglish, which our protagonist has troubles adjusting with. Delhi, that now has been divided into Greater Kailash, Mayur Vihar, Chanakya Puri and what not, and somewhere in a corner there is the poet's beloved place, ballimaran that finds itself confined to a few narrow roads no one wants to go to. The river Yamuna, that at one time looked to be the dividing border-line between Delhi and the rest of the world, now finds itself situated inside Delhi.
Well, the plot just begins here.
What follows is the poet's journey to establish himself and regain his stature of the good old Ghalib, that now stays in people's memories only through Jagjit Singh's ghazals or Nasiruddin Shah's TV serial act; But is it really that easy to regain his status of a poet? With all those 'janam samjha karo' and 'bidi jalaye le' songs being on the tip of everyone's tongue, who wants to recall those hard to understand words of 'aah ko chaahiye ik umr asar hone tak'?
Spontaneous, well written and flawlessly acted, with a wonderful sense of timing, this one is a dose of non-stop laughter for almost one and half an hour. Such well executed plays are a rarity these days.
A near-perfect comical, satirical masterpiece for which the entire team deserves a big applause. Those who missed 'Ghalib in New Delhi' on Jun 3rd, can have the fortune of watching it again on Jun 17th 2007. My advice: don't miss it this time.
Note: The words and opinions stated above are solely of the author himself, who is said to be under the strong influence of the play and finding hard to come out of it.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
A life behind porno.
* Caution: Links in this blog are a little work-unsafe.
While surfing on IMDb message boards, recently I stumbled upon this IMDb page of an X-rated video I had watched a long long ago, about which one of my friends had this statement to make:
"If there ever were an academy award for porn, this movie deserved one."
Really, how many times do you see porn movies that have a storyline, genuine acting and shot on 35mm film cameras, not on handycams.
Anyways, what I did not know was that the gorgeous looking female lead, Rosa Caracciolo is an ex miss Hungary, and the wife of well-known porn-star Rocco Siffredi (who also appeared in the movie as the male lead.)
This feature on The Guardian showed up with a glimpse into his behind-the-scenes life, and another IMDb page dedicated to this man's biography and some of his quotes, that at times also show a totally different side of his personality.
I was thinking, is that life really different from anyone else's?
Despite what appears on the surface, I guess somewhere deep down it's just about being in a profession and loving it; After all, when was the last time you saw someone being successful without a passion for his work. So what if it is pornography?
But then I was trying to understand the emotions behind his words, about his wife:
"She accepts many things, but I'm thinking any woman in the world would wish to have her man only for her."
Words like those, when coming out the mouth of a person who is been into porn industry for more than 20 years, and has worked in 1000+ movies, sound strange. Personally from my experience; ok, I'm a virgin, but I could relate it to other worldly pleasures, luxuries, money etc. The more you have, more you find it difficult to imagine a life without those, doesn't matter what the age, what the circumstances.
And so I was thinking about, how difficult it is to retain one's simplicity of thoughts even when put into a situation like that? Or how easy it is to make a decision like that for someone you care?
While surfing on IMDb message boards, recently I stumbled upon this IMDb page of an X-rated video I had watched a long long ago, about which one of my friends had this statement to make:
"If there ever were an academy award for porn, this movie deserved one."
Really, how many times do you see porn movies that have a storyline, genuine acting and shot on 35mm film cameras, not on handycams.
Anyways, what I did not know was that the gorgeous looking female lead, Rosa Caracciolo is an ex miss Hungary, and the wife of well-known porn-star Rocco Siffredi (who also appeared in the movie as the male lead.)
This feature on The Guardian showed up with a glimpse into his behind-the-scenes life, and another IMDb page dedicated to this man's biography and some of his quotes, that at times also show a totally different side of his personality.
I was thinking, is that life really different from anyone else's?
Despite what appears on the surface, I guess somewhere deep down it's just about being in a profession and loving it; After all, when was the last time you saw someone being successful without a passion for his work. So what if it is pornography?
But then I was trying to understand the emotions behind his words, about his wife:
"She accepts many things, but I'm thinking any woman in the world would wish to have her man only for her."
Words like those, when coming out the mouth of a person who is been into porn industry for more than 20 years, and has worked in 1000+ movies, sound strange. Personally from my experience; ok, I'm a virgin, but I could relate it to other worldly pleasures, luxuries, money etc. The more you have, more you find it difficult to imagine a life without those, doesn't matter what the age, what the circumstances.
And so I was thinking about, how difficult it is to retain one's simplicity of thoughts even when put into a situation like that? Or how easy it is to make a decision like that for someone you care?
Friday, May 25, 2007
Looking back into the history
Why do I find this movie so appealing?
I asked myself when I watched the movie The Cook, the thief his wife and her lover
The camera? There was something very unusual about the camera work, but I could never explain what it was, until recently, when I went through some of my very first classes on the history of cinema, and until I watched some of the movies made in late 1890s and early 1900s.
Picture this, half of the time you do not get any close-ups of the characters, only long shots, which cover each and every corner of the set, each and every movement of the characters that fit into the frame.
The camera almost always maintains a fixed distance from the characters, except for the cases when the characters themselves walk towards the camera to gain the attention, converting a long shot into a mid-shot.
The story, takes place mainly in four locations, the outside, the kitchen, the dining-room and the rest-room, out of which the first three locations are consecutive, the dining room opens into the kitchen, which on the other side opens to the outside road; so as the characters walk from one location to other, the camera moves with them, almost always maintaining a fix distance, and as the characters go through the door, the camera seem to go through the wall, a blank screen for a moment, cut away, and follows the character in the next location.
Now, while I was watching this movie, The Great Train Robbery made in 1903, that has most of its scenes taken from a fixed camera position, I got that very similar feel of camera work;
"This is not cinema, this is... more of a theater, a stage play."
- I said.
And yes, i could relate, what The cook, the thief... offered was exactly this, A very deliberate emulation of a stage play, drifting away from the basic concepts of cinema techniques, drifting away from the sudden cuts and close-ups, it tries to put the camera exactly at a place where the audience of a stage play should find itself.
No wonder, once I understood that; I was able to find and appreciate lots of other trivial symbolisms, the opening/closing of the doors, the curtains and a different colored lights for different locations, all such things started showing up once I set to watch the movie again, in the context of the stage.
I asked myself when I watched the movie The Cook, the thief his wife and her lover
Yes, the sets were lavish, lights and color compositions looked awesome, beyond imagination, and the whole movie, scene by scene gave a feel of a beautiful painting. Among other eye-candies I could also add the costumes, designed by Jean Paul Gaultier and of course the beautiful Helen Mirren who looked equally beautiful without those cloths, at the age of 44 at that time.
The camera? There was something very unusual about the camera work, but I could never explain what it was, until recently, when I went through some of my very first classes on the history of cinema, and until I watched some of the movies made in late 1890s and early 1900s.
Picture this, half of the time you do not get any close-ups of the characters, only long shots, which cover each and every corner of the set, each and every movement of the characters that fit into the frame.
The camera almost always maintains a fixed distance from the characters, except for the cases when the characters themselves walk towards the camera to gain the attention, converting a long shot into a mid-shot.
The story, takes place mainly in four locations, the outside, the kitchen, the dining-room and the rest-room, out of which the first three locations are consecutive, the dining room opens into the kitchen, which on the other side opens to the outside road; so as the characters walk from one location to other, the camera moves with them, almost always maintaining a fix distance, and as the characters go through the door, the camera seem to go through the wall, a blank screen for a moment, cut away, and follows the character in the next location.
Now, while I was watching this movie, The Great Train Robbery made in 1903, that has most of its scenes taken from a fixed camera position, I got that very similar feel of camera work;
"This is not cinema, this is... more of a theater, a stage play."
- I said.
And yes, i could relate, what The cook, the thief... offered was exactly this, A very deliberate emulation of a stage play, drifting away from the basic concepts of cinema techniques, drifting away from the sudden cuts and close-ups, it tries to put the camera exactly at a place where the audience of a stage play should find itself.
No wonder, once I understood that; I was able to find and appreciate lots of other trivial symbolisms, the opening/closing of the doors, the curtains and a different colored lights for different locations, all such things started showing up once I set to watch the movie again, in the context of the stage.
Digging into details
How many times do you watch a movie again, and how many times does it happen that even after a third or fourth viewing you come across something new that you didn't notice earlier.
An embarrassing admission, this was my fifteenth viewing of the movie lola rennt in last three years, and in my fifteenth viewing did I come across this little fact.
See the snapshot at 00:04:58 run time,
and another one at 01:00:18
IMDb trivia did not mention anything about it, so had to google a lot, and finally found this website to confirm my suspicion.
An embarrassing admission, this was my fifteenth viewing of the movie lola rennt in last three years, and in my fifteenth viewing did I come across this little fact.See the snapshot at 00:04:58 run time,
and another one at 01:00:18
IMDb trivia did not mention anything about it, so had to google a lot, and finally found this website to confirm my suspicion.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
